Are the Wrong Expectations Ruining Your Life?
It may sound dramatic, but the wrong expectations may be the obstacles that are standing in between you and the relationships that you want to have, the career or business that you want to build, and most importantly, feeling that you are enough, exactly how you are.
Expectations
We don’t typically think about them, but expectations drive our decisions, our behaviours, our goals and how we feel about ourselves.
From the moment we are born, we breathe in the expectations of our family, our society, our cultures.
They create the template for the life that we want to live, the businesses that we build, the career path that is before us.
Is your reality meeting your expectations?
Expectation vs Reality
As a clinical psychologist, I have worked with hundreds of people whose reality did not match up with their expectations.
I coined the term Expectation Discrepancy Syndrome, the common experience where there is a gap between expectations and reality. Within this gap, live shame, guilt, judgement and overwhelm.
How do we close the gap?
The Expectation C.U.R.E.
CONSCIOUS
Become conscious of the expectation that you are trying to meet.
Identify the signs that you are experiencing a gap between expectations and reality.
UNPACK
Where did the expectation come from?
We breathe in expectations from multiple sources; our families, our culture, our society.
Is the expectation aligned with your values and how you want to live your life?
RE-WRITE
Write a new expectation that is both aligned AND realistic.
Literally, write it down somewhere as a reminder to yourself.
EXECUTE
Commit to living out your new expectation.
Communicate the expectation to others.
Celebrate yourself!